Sunday, April 20, 2008

The Candidate

"Putting the world to rights", or spreading bigotry, bollocks & bullshit, as I prefer to call it, has been Kelvin MacKenzie's stock-in-trade since, ooh, he first managed to move a pen across a sheet of paper.
Yes, it's time to announce the return of Kelvinwatch, this blog's occasional look at the latest doings of the man who is to journalism what Ron Jeremy is to celibacy.
MacKenzie has decided to stand as an Independent candidate in Elmbridge, near Weybridge in Surrey ( ).
So what's galvanised the one-time fearless Thatcher champion to stand?
Ahem, parking charges at the local railway station. Yes, really.
OK, so the charges have increased by, to use a MacKenzie-esque adjective, whopping 43%, but, still, it ain't the Falklands or the miners strike, is it, Kelvin?
The former Murdoch minion is quoted thus, "I have had a look at the work involved with being a councillor and know I can fit it into my schedule."
Busy man is our Kelvin, so the voters should be grateful for his decision to fit in their concerns, I'd say. As you'd expect from someone whose view of workers is one of contempt (even when they were buying the vile little rag he put together), he wants to end the final salary pension scheme offered to the local authority staff.
Quoth MacKenzie, "I want to stop it and reduce council tax by about 20%."
I look forward to Councillor MacKenzie, fearless tribune of the people, taking up his seat in the council chamber. I also look forward to George W. Bush admitting his responsibility for hundreds of thousands of deaths in Iraq.

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